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The Viper Emporium.

Where all your snake longings become hisstory.


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Monocled Cobra

Delight your neighbours' kids with this snake's venemous fangs and classic cobra shape.
Highly lethal.

Monocled Cobra
Price:      $130.00
Quantity:  

White Lipped Tree Viper

Pesky neighbourhood animals bothering you?
How about neighbourhood kids?
This venemous viper's bite won't kill adults (immediately!) but should help with any other pests.

White-Lipped Tree Viper
Price:      $220.00
Quantity:

Anti-Venom

Whoooopsie-daisy. Poisoned ourselves have we?
Or perhaps this is pre-emptive.
Anyhow, this anti-venom is 100% guaranteed to cure any and all snake bites.

Anti-Venom Crystals
Price:      $5000.00
Quantity:

Man-Sized Plush Snake

For all you snake enthusiasts out there with young children!
(Bad idea by the way)
Get your kids started early with this 8-foot long snake plushie!
Make sure to get some anti-venom as well if you care at all about your kids.

Plush Toy for the Kids
Price:      $80.00
Quantity:

Snake Oil

Our highest quality snake oil.
Clinically proven to cure obesity, cancer, tuberculosis,
chronic pain, blindness, loss of limbs, money problems, and death.
Buy two and you'll become superman. Guaranteed.

Snake Oil
Price:      $15000.00
Quantity:


All Sales Final.

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